The Piece of Me I Leave Behind
*The piece of me I leave behind
The independent and strong-willed mind
She stomps and cries and pleads her case
Yet here her iron will is just a waste
See, I am determined to change my fate—
No missed blessings, no humbling regrets,
Just a Creator’s plan and pace and fear unmet.
There is no space for pride, no room for hate;
My journey is paved with love and held in grace.
So the piece of me I leave behind God replaces
With this peace of mine.*
I’m realizing I have to learn to put things together faster now. And I don’t mean furniture — I mean my life. I’m not used to this feeling, this odd, gentle weightlessness. It’s the emotional manifestation of the exchange Jesus talks about in Matthew 11:30: “My yoke is easy, and my burden is light.”
That’s exactly what this feels like. Lighter. Freer. Unfamiliar.
And now I keep sensing the nudge: “Smile.”
Normally, that’s my cue to roll my eyes or prepare a whole dissertation on why you don’t tell a Black woman to smile. But this time? I paused. I thought about it.
Compliments and I have a complicated relationship. If I don’t know their origin, my mind won’t accept them without a full investigation. (I’m working on that, Lord knows.) But my smile is one of the things I get complimented on the most. It’s just… shy. Like me. It doesn’t come out much. Not because I lack joy, but because I live so deeply in my head.
And that habit — the constant thinking, analyzing, observing from the top balcony of my own mind — I’m realizing it’s not just an emotional block. It’s a spiritual one too.
Here’s the revelation that finally clicked today:
The reason so many women talk about how easy it feels with the partner God sends them isn’t magic. It’s practice.
Practice with God.
No, I’m not saying don’t plan. Scripture literally advocates for planning. But there’s a rhythm we forget: make the plan, pray over the plan, and hand the plan back.
I’ve told myself this before, and I’m telling myself again. Healing is not linear. It’s not the neat, straight road we pretend it is. And if I’ve circled back here, it’s fine. Grace loops as many times as necessary. Mercy doesn’t run out.
Each reset gets me closer to the version of me I’ve been praying to grow into — the fully manifested Her.
Amen.
I offer this as a reminder that what you release returns as peace.
May you rest in the assurance that your becoming is already held.
Yours in haute healing,
DreamGirl ✨🌿
