This Sunday, I woke up with something I hadn’t felt in a long time: ease. No pressure to move quickly, no impulse to check my phone or run through a mental to-do list. Just stillness. And in that calm came a quiet knowing:

I am free to live in a bit of leisure.

Living a life of leisure is often associated with life post-retirement or jokingly refers to the lives of pets and even babies and toddlers. Yet, as fully functioning adults who have yet to reach our goals, our leisure is relegated to vacations and days off. But hustle culture teaches that there are no days off if you aren’t there yet. And once you get there, what is next? No wonder it took me so long to experience this luxury.

In the past, I found myself internally succumbing to the labels lazy, unproductive, and unmotivated if I was not constantly working on the plan I created to achieve this vision of my life. It was nonstop. However, recently, I began to understand that slowing my pace allows me to embrace the elegance of my feminity and smoothens my actions, attitudes, and behavior. And while I used to feel behind and constantly needing to catch up, now I realize that the smoother I am, the easier it is to accelerate. Slow is smooth. Smooth is fast.

Routines are proven to keep us functioning, but presence keeps us connected. So, instead of grabbing my phone when I woke up today, I lay still in bed, absorbing the light and feeling the joy of life. Instead of allowing my mind to wander while I brushed my teeth, I smiled at myself in the mirror before and after. I reminded myself what a blessing it is to be able to take care of myself. It felt like the ending of a routine and the beginning of a ritual.

A genesis experience—the decision to change can happen instantly, but reprogramming the mind from its routine defaults to view even the most mundane parts of life as rituals will take more time. For most of my life, I have had the same defaults with minor tweaks. I must be patient and consistent enough to work with myself until my routines are broken. Now, I look forward to my rituals- falling asleep while imagining the warm cup my hands will hold in the morning. I acknowledge that I am still programmed to see life as a set of routines to keep me performing at peak capacity. Yet this awakening to the mindfulness of gratitude and the ritualistic perspective is exciting and worth the work.

My stillness and awakening are deeply personal. As you read this, you may think that there is no way this could work for you. That’s fair. You should evaluate what prevents you from enjoying a free luxury in your everyday experience. Then consider one small change you could make to welcome that luxury into your atmosphere. After all, we deserve it.

Until next time…