Today, I learned what nonchalance can feel like when it’s not born from pain or trauma response. I learned because I knew what to name it as soon as I embodied it. That is knowing.

I didn’t love how I looked, but I loved that I showed up anyway. I didn’t hide. I didn’t shrink. I didn’t perform.

But at the root—I didn’t care.
Not because I was depressed or bothered.
But because my presence mattered more than my appearance.

And that was enough.

There’s a divine awareness that floods you when, in real time, you realize your worth doesn’t fluctuate based on effort, appearance, or polish.

And if you’re in a healing space, you feel it often—not because it’s old news, but because it’s still new. Still tender. Still becoming you.

It’s in you. It is you. It always was.
But your vision has to change to recognize it.

This moment taught me more about freedom from the cage of caring about onlookers, about the quiet power of consistently choosing not to overthink moments, and about letting my feminine energy lead the day—not with the patriarchal expectation of softness that submits without question but with a modern-day Ashley kind of softness that simply chooses.

While celebrating this milestone, I would not neglect my work and just believe this knowing happened overnight. It is a result of my repeated decision not to allow my thoughts to become a time machine, creating outcomes like predictions. A regular Herstradamus of a new age.

Today, I showed up. I worked. I connected. I laughed. I led.
And not once did I have to “look the part” to embody my place.

That’s new for me.

And although my curls will be back soon, I can confidently say:

Ashley, acknowledge your growth. Look at what is happening inside you and bask in that progress for a moment.

Cheers to the bloom.🥂